O'Brien, Conan
"One of the women who claims she slept with Tiger Woods says they never talked about golf while having sex. However, contractually Tiger was obligated to talk about Nike, Gatorade and American Express."
Article: "Game" by Thompson Evans

Fields, W.C.
"There comes a time in the affairs of man when he must take the bull by the tail and face the situation."
Article: Terry McDermott, a Writer I Love Part II

Ashcroft, John
"The FBI. is a massive culture. It's been a culture that served America well, and it's been focused on prosecution. But what we need in terms of terrorism is prevention."
Article: Terry McDermott and The Hunt for KSM

Rolling Stones
"You can't always get what you want"
Article: "Hudson" by Sarah McLaughlin

Santayana, George
"Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it"
Article: "Hudson" by Sarah McLaughlin

Wolfe, Thomas
“You can’t go home again.”
Article: "Hudson" by Sarah McLaughlin

King, Stephen
“When asked, ‘How do you write?’ I invariably answer, ‘one word at a time.’.”
Article: "Cult" Part II by Rockne O'Bannon

Dick, Philip K.
“Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.” 
Article: "Cult" by Rockne O'Bannon

Gide, Andre
"It is only in adventure that some people succeed in knowing themselves - in finding themselves."
Article: "The Hungry Rabbit Jumps" Part II by Robert Tannen

Hammett, Dashiell
“People always say things like, Oh, well, he was suffering so much that he was better off dying. But that's not true. You're always better off living."
Article: "The Hungry Rabbit Jumps" by Robert Tannen

Porter, Cole
"If they ever put a bullet through your brain, I'll complain. It's friendship, friendship, just a perfect blendship. When other friendships have been forgit, ours will still be it."
Article: "The Doctor" Part III by Rina Mamoun

Fuller, Samuel
“When you're at the end of your rope, all you have to do is make one foot move out in front of the other. Just take the next step. That's all there is to it.” 
Article: "The Doctor" Part II by Rina Mamoun

Bombeck, Erma
"When your mother asks, "Do you want a piece of advice?" it is a mere formality. It doesn't matter if you answer yes or no. You're going to get it anyway."
Article: "The Doctor" by Rina Mamoun 

Lopez, Robert and Marx, Jeff
“Schadenfreude” from “Avenue Q” 
Gary: Right now you are down and out, and feelin' really crappy.
Nicky: I'll say.
Gary: And when I see how sad you are, it sort of makes me happy!
Nicky: "Happy?"
Gary: Sorry, Nicky, human nature, nothing I can do~! It's Schadenfreude makin' me feel glad that I'm not you!
Article: "Boston's Finest" Part II by Richard Hatem

Fields, W.C.
“The world is getting to be such a dangerous place, a man is lucky to get out of it alive.”
Article: "Boston's Finest" Part I by Richard Hatem

Lloyd, David
"A little song, a little dance, a little seltzer down your pants"
Article: "Two Dicks" by Phoef Sutton

Chaplin, Charles
“Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, and a comedy in long shot.”
Article: "The Deal" by Peter Lefcourt

Coward, Noel
“Success took me to her bosom like a maternal boa constrictor.”
Article: "Manhattan Beach Project" by Peter Lefcourt

Bombeck, Erma
“If you can't make it better, you can laugh at it.”
Article: "Untitled Peter Knight/Happy Madison Project" Part II by Peter Knight

Fields, W.C.
“If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no point in being a damn fool about it.” 
Article: "Untitled Peter Knight/Happy Madison Project" by Peter Knight

Leonard, Elmore
“If it sounds like writing, I rewrite it.”
Article: "The Staked Plains" Part II by Peter Blake

Ford, John
"When the legend becomes the fact, print the legend” 
Article: "The Staked Plains" by Peter Blake

Rowling, J.K.
“Hearing voices no one else can hear isn't a good sign, even in the wizarding world.” 
Article: "The Wizard of Exeter Hall" by Nicole Ranadive

Hepburn, Katherine
“If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun.”
Article: "Preserving Our Cultural Heritage" by Nicholas Meyer

"I've been dead before"
Article: "Orpheus" by Nicholas Meyer

Hubbard, L. Ron
“If you want to make a little money, write a book.  If you want to make a lot of money, create a religion.”
Article: "Orpheus" by Nicholas Meyer

Quayle, Dan
“I was recently on a tour of Latin America, and the only regret I have was that I didn't study Latin harder in school so I could converse with those people.”
Article: "Getting in Good" by Tze Chun and Mike Weiss

Wambaugh, Joseph
"As a cop, I dealt with every kind of bum and criminal. They all have more integrity than some Hollywood people."
Article: "Blue Blood" Part I by Neil Tolkin

Lazarus, Emma
“Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, the wretched refuse of your teeming shore. Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me, I lift my lamp beside the golden door!”
Article: "Funny in Farsi" by Nastaran Dibai and Jeffrey B. Hodes

Rothstein, Arnold
“The more money the louder it talks.” 
Article: "Cutthroat" Part II by Michele Fazekas and Tara Butters

Marquis, Don
“Blood will tell, but often it tells too much.”
Article: "Cutthroat" Part I by Michele Fazekas and Tara Butters

Churchill, Winston
“It is no use saying, 'We are doing our best.' You have got to succeed in doing what is necessary.”
Article: "King of the Road" by Michael Oates Palmer

Chandler, Raymond
“She gave me a smile I could feel in my hip pocket.”
Article: "Jane's Life" Part II by Michael A. Ross

Parker, Dorothy
“Ducking for apples. Change one letter and it’s the story of my life.”
Article: "Janes Life" Part I by Michael A. Ross

Darwin, Charles
“It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent that survives. It is the one that is the most adaptable to change.”
Article: "Firefall" by Melody Fox

Gide, Andre
“The color of truth is gray.” 
Article: "The Cover" by Matt Michnovetz

Stewart, Jon
"(Terrorists) are planning to disrupt our democratic process. It's scary I know, but we're not going to let al Qaeda tell us what to do. In fact, our government has decided that if al Qaeda attempts to disrupt our democratic process, we are going to respond by disrupting it first." 
Article: "The Cell" Part II by Mark Jordan Legan and Mark Wilding

Greene, Graham
"I don't care a damn about men who are loyal to the people who pay them, to organizations...I don't think even my country means all that much. There are many countries in our blood, aren't there, but only one person. Would the world be in the mess it is if we were loyal to love and not to countries?"
Article: "The Cell" Part I by Mark Jordan Legan and Mark Wilding

Eleanor of Aquitaine
“What family doesn't have its ups and downs?”
Article: "The Eastmans" by Margaret Nagle

Cocteau, Jean
“Life is a horizontal fall.” 
Article: "Capitol Police" by Kimberly Simi

Parker, Dorothy
"If you have any young friends who aspire to become writers, the second greatest favor you can do them is to present them with copies of The Elements of Style. The first greatest, of course, is to shoot them now, while they’re happy." 
Article: "Recovering Justice" Part III by Kevin Hynes

Hemingway, Ernest
"There's no one thing that is true. They're all true."
Article: "Recovering Justice" Part II by Kevin Hynes

Holmes, Oliver Wendell Jr.
"This is a court of law, young man, not a court of justice."
Article: "Recovering Justice" Part I by Kevin Hynes

Ephron, Nora
"My mother wanted us to understand that the tragedies of your life one day have the potential to be comic stories the next."
Article: "Also Known As" Part II by Kerry Ehrin

Marquis, Don
"I would rather start a family than finish one."
Article: "Also Known As" Part I by Kerry Ehrin

"Self-love is the instrument of our preservation."
Article: "Eight Pieces for Josette" by Kasi Lemmons

"A woman goes into a bar and asks for a 'double entendre.' So the bartender gave her one.'
Article: "The Man of Your Dreams" by Jay Lacopo

Meade, George H.
"A multiple personality is in a certain sense normal."
Article: "Ego Trip" by Joanna Lovinger

Sham, Sam and the Pharaohs
"Hey there Little Red Riding Hood, you sure are looking good. You're everything a big bad wolf could want."
Article: "Little Red" by John Kirk & Erik Gardner

Cunningham, John W.
"It's a great life. You risk your skin catchin' killers and the juries turn 'em loose so they can come back and shoot at ya again. If you're honest, you're poor your whole life, and in the end you wind up dyin' all along on some dirty street. For what? For nothin'. For a tin star." - "High Noon"
Article: "Western Ave." by John Mandel

Heinlein, Robert A.
"You can have peace. Or you can have freedom. Don't ever count on having both at once."
Article: "Them" by John McNamara and David Eick

Heller, Joseph
"Anything worth living for," said Nately, "is worth dying for." "And anything worth dying for," answered the old man, "is certainly worth living for." - Catch 22 
Article: "Emerald City" By John Rice

Camus, Albert
"You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life."
Article: "Back" by Dean Widenmann

Twain, Mark
"A Man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar."
Article: "Calloways' Law" by Ashley Gable

Thompson, Hunter S.
"I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me."
Article: "The Big 180" Part I by Dusty Kay

Marx, Groucho
"The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made."
Article: "The Big 180" Part II by Dusty Kay

Faulkner, William
"The past is never dead. It's not even past."
Article: "Chapel Hill" by Elizabeth M. Cosin

Kasdan, Jake
"To be honest? Original scares me. You never want to be too original." - Lenny in The TV Set
Article: "Meat Market" by Eric Charmelo and Nicole Snyder

Waters, John
"I thank God I was raised Catholic, so sex will always be dirty."
Article: "Meat Market" Part II by Eric Charmelo and Nicole Snyder

Franklin, Benjamin
"A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small bundle."
Article: "August" by Howard Rodman

Polonsky, Abraham
"Money has no moral opinions."
Article: "August" Part II by Howard Rodman

Dick, Philip K.
"The basic tool for the manipulation of reality is the manipulation of words. If you can control the meaning of words, you can control the people who must use the words."
Article: "August" Part III by Howard Rodman

Johnson, Samuel
"Revenge is an acto of passion; vengeance of justice. Injuries are revenged; crimes are avenged"
Article: "The Associate" by J. Mills Goodloe

O'Brien, Conan
"Roger Ailes, the head of the Fox News Channel, is denying reports that he sent President Bush a letter giving him advice on the war. In his own defense Ailes said I'm not in a position to give anyone advice, I hired Geraldo."
Article: "What's Your Story" by Jack Bernstein

O'Neil, Ed
"When I read the piloit for 'Married with Children', it just reminded me of my Uncle Joe... just a self-deprecating kind of guy. He'd come home from work, and the wife would maybe say 'I ran over the dog this morning in the driveway.' And he would say 'Fine, what's for dinner?"
Article: "Welcome to Youngstown" Part II by Jack LoGiudice

Darrow, Clarence
"History repeats itself, and that's one of the things that's wrong with history" 
Article: "Welcome to Youngstown" Part I by Jack LoGiudice

Serling, Rod
"There is a fifth dimension, beyond that which is known to man. It is a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity. It is the middle ground between light and shadow, between science and superstition."
Article: "The Last Hundred Days" by James Thorpe

Parker, Dorothy
"The best way to keep children at home is to make the home a pleasant atomsphere and let the air out of the tires."
Article: Janet Leahy, A Writer I Love Part III



White, E.B.
"I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day."
Article: Janet Leahy, A Writer I Love Part II

Wilde, Oscar
"Questions are never indiscreet, answers sometimes are."
Article: Janet Leahy, A Writer I Love




Murrow, Edward R.
"Everyone is a prisoner of his own experiences. No one can eliminate prejudices - just recognize them."
Article: "The Border" by Dawn Comer Jefferson

Nichols, Mike
"The only safe thing is to take a chance."
Article: David Mirkin, A Writer I Love Part III

Wilde, Oscar
"When the gods wish to punish us they answer our prayers."
Article: David Mirkin, A Writer I Love Part II



Letterman, David
"I heard some good news today. The FBI and the CIA are going to start coooperating. They are going to start working together. And if you don't know the difference between the FBI and the CIA, the FBI bungles domestic crime, the CIA bungles foreign crime."
Article: "The Domestic Front" by David M. Stern

Ionesco, Eugene
"A work of art is above all an adventure of the mind."
Article: "The Wreck of the Leviathan" Part II by Chris Kelley

Du Maurier, Daphne
"Dead men tell no tales, Mary."
Article: "The Wreck of the Leviathan" by Chris Kelley

Kerr, Jean
"If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, it's just possible you haven't grasped the situation."
Article: "Private Eyes" by Chip Johannessen

Rogers, Will
"Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for."
Article: "Bedlam, New York" by Carla Robinson

Dunne, Dominick
"When you're down & out, there's no meaner place to live than Hollywood."
Article: "Here...After" by Brian Ross
Article: "The Compleat Pratt" by Jon Sherman
Article: "Captain Cook's Extraordinary Atlas" by Thomas Wheeler

Brooks, James L.
“What do you think the Devil is going to look like if he's around? Nobody is going to be taken in if he has a long, red, pointy tail. No. I'm semi-serious here. He will look attractive and he will be nice and helpful and he will get a job where he influences a great God-fearing nation and he will never do an evil thing... he will just bit by little bit lower standards where they are important. Just coax along flash over substance... Just a tiny bit.” – Aaron Altman in “Broadcast News” 
Article: "Hard News" Part II by Brett Conrad

Chayefsky, Paddy
"I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take this anymore." (Howard Beale in "Network")
Article: "Hard News" by Brett Conrad

Kinsey, Alfred
"The only unnatural sex act is that which you cannot perform."
Article: "Love Machine" by Bird York

Condon, Richard
"His brain has not only been washed, as they say... It has been dry cleaned."
Article: "Identities" by Ben Sokolowsky

Michael, Shayne
"In those big floppy shoes and baggy pants, Bongo really should have assumed running for safety was a long shot."
Article: "Bulls*t" by Ben Murray

York, Michael
"I think that you have to believe in your destiny; that you will succeed, you will meet a lot of rejection and it is not always a straight path, there will be detours - so enjoy the view."
Article: "Limbo" Part II by Brandon Camp

Jennings, Peter
"Don't be confused that my interest in religion, faith and spirituality is driven by any sense of faith or spirituality of my own."
Article: "Limbo" by Brandon Camp

Lansky, Meyer
"Don't worry, don't worry. Look at the Astors and the Vanderbilts, all those big society people. They were the worst thieves - and now look at them. It's just a matter of time."
Article: "Cuba Libre" by Andrew Colville

Murrow, Edward R.
"The obscure we see eventually. The obvious, it seems, takes longer."
Article: "77" Part II by David Matthews

Fuller, Samuel
"You know how you smoke out a sniper? You send a guy out in the open and you see if he gets shot. They thought that one up at West Point."
Article: "77" by David Matthews

Goldwyn, Samuel
"Here I am paying money to you writers and what for? All you do is change the words."
Article: "Nevermind Nirvana" by Ajay Sahgal

Greeley, Horace
"Go west young man, and grow up with the country."
Article: "Come West with Me" by Craig Bolotin

Waters, John
"I'd love to sell out completely. It's just that nobody has been willing to by."
Article: David Dean Bottrell, a Writer I Love

West, Mae
"I enjoyed the courtroom as just another stage but not so amusing as Broadway."
Winnie Holzman and Irene Mecchi Part 2

Wilder, Billy 
"An audience is never wrong. An individual member of it may be an imbecile, but a thousand imbeciles together in the dark - that is critical genius."
Winnie Holzman and Irene Mecchi

Allen, Woody:
"Man consists of two parts, his mind and his body, only the body has more fun.."
Article: "Love Machine" by Bird York

Allen, Fred:
"An associate producer is the only guy in Hollywood who will associate with a producer."
Article: Nick Santora, A Writer I Love Part II

Allen, Fred:
"All I know about humor is that I don't know anything about it."
Article: "Untitled Peter Knight/Happy Madison Project" by Peter Knight

Allen, Fred:
"Television is a medium because anything well done is rare."
Article: "Also Known As" Part I by Kerry Ehrin


"Surrealism is destructive, but it destroys only what it considers to be shackles limiting our vision."

- Salvador Dali

F. Scott Fitzgerald

F. Scott Fitzgerald